I don't regret it, but I think I shouldn't had...

It's 4 o'clock in the morning, and I couldn't help it but to get up from my bed and start writing.

You know... I had this inside of me and I knew I had to let it out, and although I really had to, now I think I shouldn't had done it. Yes... I told her almost everything that was chewing me up inside for the past... month, maybe? I was so damn nervous while I was talking 'cause I had never [and I wanna make emphasis on the word "NEVER"] been so honest with a person about that kind of feelings; I've always been the tough one. But tonight I proved myself wrong. Tonight I realized that I'm not always the tough one, or not always have to be that one. I believe I'm sort of addicted to her; she's like my own brand of heroine. And despite the fact that I told her, I don't feel completely satisfied. Would anyone please [and I'm begging] tell me why I feel this way if I know that I had to let it out? A part of me feels better now that she knows what was going on, but the other part thinks I did wrong. Now I can't sleep, damn it! She wasn't being very talkative after I said everything. Honestly, not that many words came out of her mouth. Maybe that's the reason of why I'm feeling this way. I think I was expecting for a better explanation. I still need some good answers.

I don't know what's gonna happen now. I'm so lost in my thoughts that I can't even put my thoughts together. I get mad and frustrated just to think about it; just to think about what she did. Or didn't do, better said. I know it's gonna be hard but I'll try to bury it in the past.

Tomorrow is gonna suck for me; I feel it, and I know it. But I guess I'll just have to sit, wait, and see what's gonna happen. I really hope for her to give me more thoughts from herself on the subject.

P.S.: this song came up a few minutes ago. I love it, so I'll just paste it into this post. Maybe it means something.

Is it worth the can you even hear me
Standing with your spotlight on me
Not enough to feed the hungry
I'm tired and I felt it for awhile now
In this sea of lonely
The taste of ink is getting old
It's four o' clock in the fucking morning
Each day gets more and more like the last day
Still I can see it coming
While I'm standing in the river drowning
This could be my chance to break out
This could be my chance to say goodbye
At last it's finally over
Couldn't take this town much longer
Being half dead wasn't what I planned to be
Now I'm ready to be free

So here I am it's in my hands
And I'll savor every moment of this
So here I am alive at last
And I'll savor every moment of this